Leda
Later today I'll have a winner to announce, but right now I want to apologize for not having posted any new recipes this past week and to tell you a little about what's been going on in my life. Those of you who follow me on Twitter will have heard about this as it happened: Just before Thanksgiving, we discovered that our second-oldest cat, Leda, had a tumor blocking her intestines. The prognosis didn't look good--these tumors are almost always cancer--but if she were to have any hope, she needed an operation. On December 2, the vet performed surgery, removing a tumor the size of a ping-pong ball and one lymph node. Tests showed that it was malignant, but there was a slim chance that all the cancer had been removed.
Leda seemed to be making a good recovery, but then a few days ago she started to go downhill fast. Already emaciated, she completely lost her appetite and couldn't keep down even food and water delivered through her feeding tube. When she was barely able to stand anymore, we knew that the cancer had spread and the end was near. On Friday, we made the decision to end her suffering, and D and I were with her when she died.
All cats are unique and special, but I do believe that some are more special than others. Leda was our special cat. At 4-weeks old, she'd been found in a drainage ditch with her brother and brought to a cat rescue organization. D and I adopted her at 6-weeks old, and the first thing she did was crawl up and drape herself over our shoulders and around our necks. For most of her 12 years, she was timid and afraid of everyone but the two of us. She'd hide whenever anyone came over, but every night she slept draped over either D's neck or mine (usually mine). Fortunately, she was a small cat or we would have never gotten any sleep!
It's been hard for D and me--the house (and our bed) seems emptier--but it's been harder on E, who has never known a world without Leda and doesn't understand why the doctors couldn't cure her. I haven't felt much inspiration to cook and have been sticking to comfort foods. I'm taking my time to grieve. As soon as I cook up anything new, I'll be sure to share it with you.
Thank you to everyone who has sent condolences and warm thoughts--and for reminding us to remember her with love and gratitude for the happiness she brought to our lives.
Labels: cats
posted by SusanV at 11:03 AM
111 Comments:
Hi Susan, I follow you on Twitter, and I am so sorry to hear you lost a member of your family.
Once these non-humans let us share out lives with them, it is hard to imagine a world without them. It's always such a tough decision to end their suffering, and I'm sorry you and your family had to go through this.
i'm so very sorry that's happened ... i have a special cat, Charlie ... and i think sometimes of how unprepared i'll be whenever her time to go comes ...
warm wishes and the best of luck ... she'll be there in spirit for you
Sorry to hear about your loss.
I'm keeping Leda and you in my deepest thoughts and prayers, Susan - please stay strong.
Shedding a tear for your loss and lovely cat. Thinking of you and your family.
Aww hun, I'm so sorry about Leda. I know how it feels to have lost a cat and it is just like losing a person. I hope you stay strong and my thoughts are with you and your family. She was beautiful =)
Oh Susan,
I'm so sorry for your loss. Isn't it amazing how much these little furries touch our hearts? Leda was such a gorgeous kitty, and I've enjoyed the photos that you've shared of her over the years. To this day, I think that the most confusing and painful death I've experienced was when one of my cats died when I was a little girl (maybe 8?). Just give E lots of chances to grieve and remember...
thinking of you,
Amey
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. We have recently had to put down 2 of our dogs within 3 months of each other, so I understand the emptiness you are feeling. Please let E know that it will get easier and that Leda must be so thankful to have had such a wonderful family.
I'm de-lurking to wish you well. Grieve as you need to. I am so sorry for your loss.
Hi Susan,
I, too, am so sorry for your loss. It sounds as if you gave her a wonderful home and a beautiful life. Hugs to you and your family.
I'm so sorry for your loss. She was a gorgeous cat.
We recently lost our beloved cat Mouse, to kidney and liver problems, so I can most certainly relate to what you are going through.
I, too, follow you on Twitter and just wanted you to know how immensely sorry I am for your loss. Thinking of you and your family... <3
I'm so sorry to hear about your loss.
Two summers ago I had a similar situation with my cat Thomas. He was one of those extra-special cats that you are talking about... my husband claims that Thomas and I were "soul mates" and must have known each other in a previous life... we were that close!
Thomas became ill rather suddenly and after a week and a half of vet visits, drugs, tests, worry and heartache, my vet admitted that there was nothing else to do - Thomas had a very invasive and aggressive liver cancer. I had to make the decision to relieve Thomas' suffering and I did so with a heavy heart. My grief was tinged with a bit of relief though, as I had hated watching him suffer and I was relieved that his suffering was over.
It's not fair that our companion animals don't live as long as us, just not fair. They give so much and require so little- just our hearts. So sorry for the hurt yours is going through now. I still think about the four-legged buddies I've lost in the past few years every day, and am thankful for those memories.
I am so sorry to hear about Leda, Susan. It sounds like your family gave her a fantastic, happy life. I'm sending hugs and happy thoughts your way.
Susan, I'm so sorry to hear about Leda. She must have been a special kitty and an important part of your family. My Dachshund kids and I send warm thoughts and condolences your way.
I'm so sorry for your loss. My family just lost two cats in a house fire. My brother's cat was found as a feral kitten, outside in the snow. He was very old, and had problems with his joints, but he was very sweet and timid, and I loved him dearly.
Not a regular commenter, but I wanted to offer my condolences. I lost my beloved cat a few years ago and I know how hard it is. You'll be in my thoughts during this difficult time for your family.
Not a regular commenter, but I wanted to offer my condolences. I lost my beloved cat a few years ago and I know how hard it is. You'll be in my thoughts during this difficult time for your family.
Susan, I am so sorry for your family's loss. I think vegans especially have a deeper understanding that animals are sentient beings with personalities, thoughts and feelings and therefore share a special bond with their pets. I have not lost a pet to sickness since I was a little girl, but I remember how sad it was. Take your time grieving. We all sympathize with what you're going through.
Oh, Susan, I'm so sorry. May your family find comfort. You have my deepest condolences.
Much love,
Serene
I'm so sorry to hear about Leda.
These furry friends are such an integral part of our families. I am so sorry for this loss, and hope you find comfort in the love you gave to her and received back. She was lucky to have found you.
I'm so very sorry. I hope you, D, and E are able to find comfort in your memories of Leda and in knowing you gave her a good life. The only bad thing about cats is that they don't live long enough.
I'm so sorry to hear about Leda, Susan :( I lost my first cat to cancer quite a few years ago, and it took me quite a few years to get over it, I know it can be an incredibly difficult thing.
My aunt sent me this poem when my cat died, and it has always helped me a lot, I read it whenever I am thinking of my cat and dogs: http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm
I'm so sorry to hear about Leda, Susan :( I lost my first cat to cancer quite a few years ago, and it took me quite a few years to get over it, I know it can be an incredibly difficult thing.
My aunt sent me this poem when my cat died, and it has always helped me a lot, I read it whenever I am thinking of my cat and dogs: http://www.petloss.com/poems/maingrp/rainbowb.htm
*hugs*
I read your blog and make your recipes all the time.
Thank you for all you do, and take care.
I'm so sorry for your loss. It's much to hard to loose our furry friends.
Susan- sorry for your loss. I will keep your family in my thoughts.
Lisa
I am sorry about the loss of your lovely Leda
Susan, grieving for the loss of a beloved pet is exactly the same as grieving for a human loved-one. May your sadness soon be replaced only with the happy memories you have of her.
Susan,
My sincerest condolences to you on the passing of your Leda. I had to let a kitty go on Thursday and had a very heartbreaking week as well. I think Leda and KiKiBear are snuggled up together and feeling young and energetic again like they did when they were just kittens.
Hugs to you,
Carrie
p.s. I wrote a letter to Kiki on my blog LolaBloom. It was SO painful to write but it also helped by allowing me to focus on all of the memories and his sweet personality traits and the things only he would do.
I'm very sorry that Leda is no longer in you and your family's life but you will always have the memories of her.
At the vet we see this a lot and it's always such a hard decision for owners to make but it's lovely to know you were with Leda til the end.
xox
poor sweetheart -- i'm glad you didn't let her suffer. hugs to you and all your family -- thank you for sharing your special one with us.
So sad!
I know this pain.
My thoughts are with you and your family.
I'm so sorry for your loss, Susan. Hugs to you all, and especially to E, losing a childhood pet is very hard.
I'm so glad Leda was rescued into such a loving family.
-Nupur
I am very sorry the loss of your furry family member. She was a beautiful kitty and I am glad that you were able to enjoy so many years with her and that she always took great comfort in you and your husband.
I am glad that she was able to go peacefully as well. I think that is one of the gifts that we as humans can compassionatly give to our furry companions.
Thankyou for sharing your story. What a gentle heart you have.
I'm so sorry for your loss. She was a beautiful kitty..
I'm so sorry for your loss. Leda looks and sounds like an amazing cat, and you must miss her terribly. Please take all the time you need for your grief, and I wish the best for you, D, and E.
Oh, I'm so sorry! What a beautiful girl she was. Lots of hugs for your family!
I'm so so sorry for your loss. She was a very beautiful cat.
*hugs and love*
Hi Susan,
I follow you on twitter. I am so sorry for your loss. I have yet to experience the loss of a pet but as I have a dog and a cat I can't even begin to imagine how hard it must be. At least you gave her lots of love and a great life. Hugs!
You're an inspiration in the kitchen, Susan. Thank you for keeping up with us devoted followers while you're dealing with your grief...for sharing Leda's special story with us.
My thoughts and prayers are with you...
I'm so sorry to hear about your cat susan. My extra special dog died of cancer age ten, and it's one of the hardest things I've ever had to deal with. My thoughts are with you and your family. Anna
I am so sorry.
My heart goes out to you and your family. We lost or Tilly from cancer last year. If happened so fast. One day she was fine the next day a tumor appeared on her jaw. We too did all we could do, but in the end we gave her what she needed most and that was peace. I still cry and miss her dearly. She too was a very special fur baby. I pray that you can be comforted by the wonderful memories that Leda gave you.
I'm so sorry about Leda - she was obviously so precious.
Love Sparkly x
What a beautiful, precious kitty she was. I'm so very sorry to hear about your loss. I love my kitties terribly and know the day that they are not with me anymore will be really, really sad... Isn't it funny the chance encounters that can lead to finding our feline friends? I rescued one of my kitties and am so very glad I got to meet him! *hugs* and best wishes to you and your family!
-Sea
I'm so sorry for your loss. Sending you good thoughts.
(((hugs))) I am so very sorry for your loss. I know that pain all too well and my heart goes out to you and your family. Leda was a beautiful girl and you were blessed to have each other. She will always be close in your heart. Please take care and know you are not alone.
I am so sorry. What a beautiful girl Leda was.
We too had a cat we had to make that hard decision about right after Thanksgiving. She was in the hospital having tests and treatments and on IVs for 4 days, but still failing fast (liver failure and severe anemia)when we ended her suffering on Tuesday.
This is always so sad and so hard. I think we do make the right decision in not letting our loved pets suffer and waste away. We remember what a wonderful kitty our Pomadora was, as I'm sure you remember Leda.
Anita
I am so terribly sorry for your loss. Thinking of you and best wishes.
I'm so sorry about Leda. Losing a pet really is like losing a member of the family.
The ability of humans to grieve over animals is one of the parts of human nature that we should be most proud of.
Having lost two older pets this year, I do know and understand your loss. I pray your pain heals quickly and but the memory of your wonderful friend stays forever with you.
As the mommy of a kitty I know how special the bond can be between humans and our furry children. My thoughts are with you during this difficult time.
No words can express how sorry I am for your loss. Just last night, the SPCA Sarah McLachlan "Silent Night" commercial came on encouraging people to donate to help abandoned animals and I started crying hysterically,just thinking about the animals in those commercials, as well as pets both myself, family, and friends have had that have suffered. The suffering of animals has always affected me harder than humans for whatever reason. I'm sure your kitty lived a long and loving life with you and cherished the time you had together just as you did.
I'm so sorry to hear about your beautiful kitty. My condolences to you and your family.
Jody
Susan,
I'm sorry for your loss. Leda was lucky to be taken in by such a caring family.
~Jain
I'm so sorry for your loss. ~ Syd
I'm sorry for your loss. You, your family, and Leda will be in my thoughts.
As long as we don't forget, they never really leave us. The love she gave to you stays in your heart.
wow, so sorry for your loss. sending comforting energy...
My heart goes out to you and your family. I lost a special cat to cancer as well, and know how that feels! Take your time, and remember that her spirit will always be with you. Much love!
Wow, I'm sitting here crying my eyes out for you and all the other commenters who have lost pets. I've been through it a number of times, and have a dog now who I truly don't know what I'll do without. My thoughts are certainly with you.
I'm sorry to hear about your loss. I will be praying for your family especially E. It is so hard to understand why loved ones pass on sometimes...
Take your time to grieve and don't let anyone rush you.
Susan and family, you are right about how special some cats are. Our cats are like family members. I am so sorry that you lost your beautiful girl. My thoughts are with you all (and your other cats).
So sorry to hear about you kitty :(
I'd be so sad if anything ever happened to my animal friend.
Hope everyones coping with the loss as well as can be
So sorry to hear about your loss. :( My deepest sympathies. I've lost two cats in my lifetime already, and I know you lose a member of the family when they go. :( My thoughts are with you at this difficult time. *hugs*
I am so sorry for your loss. She was a beautiful cat and I know that she will be missed.
Oh, Susan, I'm so sorry to hear about this! I can't imagine how sad it must be to lose a beloved pet (even the thought when it comes to one of my dogs brings tears to my eyes!). Hope you're getting some comfort from your friends and family and taking all the time you need to grieve. She was certainly a beauty, and it sounds as if she brought a lot of happiness to your lives.
I am so sorry for your loss. When my dog died, we put a scrapbook together; it gave us a lot of comfort. May you find something that will comfort your family too.
I am so sorry for your loss. I have four girl cat-children and am dreading the days when their time on this plane is over. In the past, I have had burials for cats, attended by the other animals, on one occasion with fireworks!
Those who are now gone live on in pictures but most of all in my heart. I am happy that your girl is now out of pain and at peace.
I'm so sorry that you lost a best friend. I'll be thinking and praying for you. :)
I'm so very sorry for the loss of your beautiful Leda.
I've been a lurker and follower for some time but just ahd to send my prayers in with everyone else. Cats are special souls. I truly believe that they are sent to us as teachers.
Many of us have our first attachments to a cat and animals do become like our children. I have lost many over my six plus decades and yet more come to be 'rescued' and to rescue me.
I also believe firmly that they come to us after they pass to let us know that they are fine. I've seen mine, felt them jump up on the bed next to me or heard them with a distinctive sound only they had.
Grieve as long as you need. We'll wait outside your kitchen until you're back and up to it.
Blessings,
Dina Kerik
Deepwater Journal
www.deepwaterjournal.blogspot.com
Susan and E, I am so sorry for your loss, it's unbearably hard when we lose one of our furry loved ones. They truly are like our kids to us.
My first thought when I saw the blog photo was What a Gorgeous Cat! Your Leda was so beautiful, and I'm glad she brought you so much joy. I'm very sorry for your loss - I lost a beloved cat to cancer myself, so I know how you feel. Hugs to you all.
She's a beautiful cat. I am very sorry for your loss.
Leda was so very beautiful.
Sorry for your loss.
(((HUGS)))
Susan,
I'm not a twitter-er, and didn't find out about your terrible loss until today. It's tough to lose a pet, but during the holidays it's triply awful, especially for kids. Please accept my condolences.
I haven't been doing much blog reading recently and just came here now.
I'm really sorry to hear about Leda. I hope time will heal the pain and leave you with her cherished memories.
Susan,
I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I have 3 cats and I know first hand how they become our "special babies". I cried for weeks (months actually) after the loss of my first cat. My thoughts are with you and your beautiful family.
Jody
I am so sorry for your loss! :(
Hi Susan,
I've been lurking around your blog ever since I decided to transition to a vegan diet over four years ago. Your recipes and insight have been tremendously helpful!
I wanted to take a moment to extend my most sincere condolences to you and your family for the loss of such a lovely cat. Last year my family and I had to put our beloved dog, Marcus, to sleep after battling lymph node cancer, so I understand the grief you're feeling.
In the midst of your sadness, be encouraged that Leda is no longer suffering. She was blessed to have such a loving family!
God bless you,
Marissa
Los Angeles, CA
Sorry for your loss, she was very beautiful. Thankfully, you had many good years with her.
Dayna
I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of Leda. We had a much-loved cat, Chelsea, who also slept wrapped around me. She died at the age of 18 of kidney failure, and I still miss her. Our animals are such an important part of our lives - I can't imagine a world without them. My thoughts are with you and your family.
My condolences - my thoughts are with you and your family right now.
Just wanted to say again how sorry I am for your loss. Leda sounds like she was such a special cat.
that sounds heartbreaking - our cat is so part of our family that the idea of her dying really worries me - I can only imagine it must be a sad sad time for you and send my best wishes
I am very saddened by your loss! Best wishes to you and E.
I was enjoying the grumpiness of my 21-old boy last night. I wind him up every morning and hope he has a good day. I can well imagine the loss that you are feeling.
I'm so sorry about Leda. What a beautiful girl and soul mate - I am so sorry for your loss. It's never easy.
I'm so sorry for your loss!! Hope you guys are doing okay.
Susan, E, and Family:
I am SO sorry for your tragic loss. My heart goes out to you through this most difficult time. I know what you are feeling and my only words would be to allow yourself to feel all of the emotions, INCLUDING the happy ones. It seems so difficult right now to allow yourself to laugh and enjoy life, but it is so crucial to your healing. Your Leda was the most BEAUTIFUL cat. My Mylo would have gone crazy for her, hehe. There's something about her that is so incredible. Her eyes, her angelic features. The picture alone, tells it all. Again, my heart, prayers, and deepest sympathies go out to all of you. If you need anything, please don't hesitate to email me: Simple.Divine@yahoo.com.
Love, Peace, and Warmth,
Julz
Oh dear, what a shame. She looked like such a pretty thing, and obviously brought you all so much joy. :(
RIP fuzzy baby...thoughts are with you and your family....
Such a beautiful little girl(your cat)! I lost my Cecelia two years ago, she was 18 yrs old. My condolences ...
Susan dear, I'm so very very sorry about your darling Leda. What can I say? Nothing adequate, I know. Please accept my sorrow at your loss, my admiration for you, and my continued belief that it is caring animal guardians like your dear self who make all the difference in this world. Huge hugs, River / Pat.
What a gorgeous cat. I am so sorry for your loss. This entry brought tears to my eyes. I cannot imagine what it will be like when my cat dies. I believe she is one of the special ones and we have a bond that wouldn't make sense to non-animal lovers. Anyway, I can imagine how hard this must be and my heart goes out to you. *hugs*
I am so sorry for your loss. I totally agree with you about cats or other animals that are "special" and stand out from the rest. One of my cats is like this, and I can only imagine how hard this is for you and your family. It is so unfortunate that our companion animals can't live as long as we do, but atleast they will live on through our memories.
My heart goes out to you. My disabled daughter recently lost Saffron, her beautiful Burmese cat and companion for 13 years. It devastated her. She is recovering and now has Hilda, a lovely domestic short hair who has brought such joy to her. I have lost two cats, one that was 20, the other 14. I know how much this hurts. Please accept my deepest sympathies..our furry friends are such a part of our families and when they pass on it is heart breaking. Take time to grieve, its very important. Take care...Joey
Oh Susan, I am so sorry to hear about Leda. She sounds like a sweetheart. I hope that your special memories of her will help comfort you during this difficult time.
I'm so sorry for your loss. I enjoy your blog so much. Cats seem part of the landscape sometimes, but when they're gone, their absence is so obvious.
I am so sorry to hear about your family's loss. It is always horrible to lose our furry companions and their short lives can seem a curse, but in her short life she brought your family joy and in turn felt your love. That's something that will always be with you.
I know this is a bit late, but..
I'm so sorry about Leda. I'm 17, and my family's had our two cats since I was just a year old, so I know not a world without them either. I admire your strength and optimism, two qualities I can only hope I'll be able to find when it's time for my own kitties pass over the rainbow bridge. (hugs)
Hi Susan,
I have been reading your site for a long time now and love your recipes. I just read about Leda and as I sit here with one of my cas on my lap I started to cry. I am so sorry for you and your family. There are no words. I am just sorry.
Very pretty girl.
Susan,
I have been reading your blog and recipes for over a year but as far as I can remember this is the first time I have commented. Firstly I would like to let you know that the work you put into all this has made a major difference in the development of this 22-year-old, 2-year-vegetarian. So thank you for that.
But much more importantly, I know I'm late to the party but I want to offer my condolences for your loss. I am only 22 but for as long as I can remember, my family has kept cats and I have always been close with them. This past summer I adopted my first cat of my own, my Charlie, at age about 3 weeks. His mother was keeping her kittens in a garage where they simply would not survive. Since I have taken him into my life he has been a consistent wonderful thing to come home to and a source of hope in troubled times. He's about 8 months old now and if I ran out of reasons to get up in the morning, he's the one thing that'd get me out of bed. I know a day will come when I'll have to say goodbye, but I dread it.
I tell you my story to make this point: my Charlie was 3 weeks old when I adopted him. Your Leda was 4 weeks old when she was found in a drainage ditch, 6 weeks old when you adopted her. Think about the life she had because of you, compared to the probably much shorter, more dangerous, hungrier life she would have had out on the streets (if she had even survived). And I'm sure you'd try to be modest about it, but guess what, sister, she had that wonderful life because of YOU and your family. There is nothing to regret here. There is nothing greater.
And God, she was beautiful.
If your daughter is feeling better about it, it's probably best not to bring it up, but if she needs to hear it again, I have lost many cat friends over the years and I can promise her that it does get better with time.
Again I want to thank you for what you do. I dunno, maybe to you you're just writing a blog and putting recipes on the Internet, but to this guy in Kentucky, your site is an essential tool in finding new ways to prevent suffering through my diet. I know you don't know me or have any way of verifying what I say but please believe me on this. Thank you a thousand times, and thank you for making room for beautiful Leda in your life! You know she thanked you too.
You don't have to post this. I just wanted to send you and E my condolences on the loss of your special cat, Leda. I wish you and your family a very happy 2009. Your site has helped me more than any other to get my husband to accept a healthier vegan diet. He is a native but expatriated New Orleanian and when we have the rare fight and he says he isn't eating that food anymore, I can always lure him back with your red beans and rice recipe. Today when I get my forgotten black eyed peas from the Walmart (sigh) we're making both the creole black eyed peas and the blackeyed peas and collard soup. Your lovely site is an inspiration and I thank you for introducing me to some new products like chipotle peppers and liquid smoke.
Sincerely,
Judy Dodd
Rexford, NY
Leda was beautiful. Sorry to hear of your loss.
I have three myself and since i don't have any kids, they are my kids. The mom is 10 and the two boys are 8. They are a family unit.
Even though it's been over a month, since this was written back in December, i am sending good vibes your way. Hope E isn't too lonely.
Talk soon,
Missy.
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